Chaos stinks. I hate it when nothing seems to be settled and life is one huge and uncontrolled mess. That’s where my lovely bride and I have been for the last several weeks and, by all appearances, will continue to be for a while longer. The old saying, “Sometimes you’re the windshield, sometimes you’re the bug” leaves out one person. Sometimes, you’re the one with the squeegee cleaning up the mess. That’s a lot of what’s been happening for a while. Kim and I both have squeegeed a lot of bugs. However, stress does have its effects on us including bringing things to the surface.
As we headed into this cycle of insanity, we were coming to a collection of major decisions involving our finances, my jobs, Jesus’ Outsider, and Freedom Church. Have you ever noticed that when you need your head to be the clearest that circumstances crop up that can get in the way of your thinking and hearing God’s voice?
The chaos was not without benefits. Some of the financial decisions got easier and now we only need to narrow the options to the final answers and wait upon the Lord for further direction. Finding a way to be in a place to help with Kingdom related chaos is huge for us. Some of the squeegees we’ve taken up had eternal impact and helped to build up the Kingdom. Those are the ones I take up with some joy (even when they’re challenging) because I know the why.
There is another side of the chaos that is much more difficult but just as necessary. Things that we thought were taken care of had really only been dormant. Big things in our lives that, if left unchecked, could destroy us and everything we’ve been working for over the last few years. Exreme stress often has the effect of revealing things long hidden or dormant. It’s very easy for us to fall into old, sinful patterns when the world around us is in chaos. That has happened for us. We are dealing with a stronghold in our lives that we are only now starting to see just how much damage it’s caused.
Prayer in the storms are often the most effective in changing us. When we see these sinful habits and behaviors for what they really are we can start to change them. Even the most devote follower of Christ can open themselves up to demonic activity by harboring thoughts and actions in coflict with true holiness and righteous. We have, through some sins we share, given the enemy authority over areas of our lives that long ago we should have surrendered. In fact, we though much of it had been but that’s how deception works. The false sense of security comes from thinking it’s all under control when all it’s really doing is festering under the surface.
We are now starting a cleansing of this area of our lives. We will still work on Freedom Church, albeit at a slower, more measured pace for a few weeks while we do the hard work. Already, a few days into the process, we are experiencing some level of victory but there is more work to do. We are confident in our Lord to pull us through into ultimate victory. The battle is His and already won, we only need to walk it out.
We are no different than anyone else. When extreme stress and exhaustion hit, sometimes bad things happen and bad decisions are made. The key, which is likely no surprise to any of you, is what you do with these when they happen. After coming down from the “sin high,” do you recognize the bahavior for what it is and seek to bring it under the Blood? Do you rationalize it and excuse it? The answer determines the difference between freedom and remaining in bondage. When the time comes, will you see the truth and change things or continue in chains?